Sports ERHS Should Have
Athletics: Eagle Rock’s second favorite pastime, next to littering. Nothing beats a Friday night at whatever our football stadium is called watching people tackle each other on the field for sport. If that doesn’t tickle your fancy, plenty of other teams hold games throughout the week as well. With that being said, I still feel that ERHS is deprived of sports teams. The fact that we don’t have our own golf team is a borderline crime on the admin’s part. Plenty of fun and unique sports exist outside of ERHS, some of which would be a great fit for our school. Here are a few I’ve thought of:
Out of all the sports on this list, this is the most complicated one to implement at ERHS. Picture this though, Yosemite Park is set ablaze. In its place, a shiny new cricket stadium paid for with Meal Application money. It’s the perfect plan!
The hallway floors will serve as the perfect shuffleboard. They don’t even need to be sanded, just let some kids walk on it and boom! Add some BIC pancakes as pucks, and you’ve got yourself an ideal shuffleboard setup.
We have a football field, need I say more?
Just add a game of chess between each boxing match and boom, chess boxing!
I feel like the younger, stupider Gen Z kids will appreciate this sport being added to the roster. Liabilities aside, having an inflatable Bossaball court in the quad every Tuesday would be a great addition to our school.
Minus the complex name that most students will mispronounce, Sepak Takraw, also known as Kick Volleyball, would be a great addition to this school. Like Rugby, we have a preexisting volleyball court that can be utilized for Sepak Takraw games every week. I mean, there will surely be some lawsuits since students will use their heads to hit the volleyball, but that’s a sacrifice we should be willing to make.
Imagine this, a massive tsunami hits the California coastline, wiping out all of Los Angeles, including Eagle Rock. Out from the rubble, or in this case sand, a surfing team representing a WaterWorld Kevin Costner-ish version of Eagle Rock. Surf meets happen every Thursday, the prize is a spot on dry land for the following week until the next meet.
This sport is gonna take the school to court for sure. Liabilities aside, I’m sure we can all agree that fencing in the North Gym would be a highly popular sport at this school.