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CPM Problems are Actually Deep

Art by Shaine Salonga

CPM math is the best thing since sliced bread. It has given us such wonderful problems that the funding provided by Bill Gates can be rest assured it’s going to a greater cause than a child's success. It goes above and beyond to defy logic and reason with problems that question humanity as a whole and tell reasons of history and logic being nothing more than simple equations. CPM is the key to behavioral math and understanding humans, these treasures are so powerful that the Pope's blessing could not make it any more holy. Such problems reach out to the hearts and minds of many and yet seem complex to only a few. It is because homework help that we are able to travel through this odyssey like Homer in the Trojan War, we fight parabolas and slide across number lines as we struggle to understand x2=0such things cannot be perceived by mere human eyes of flesh and blood. Our gods yet still give us homework help and sometimes 5 days of late days to make up such complex and deep word problems that wrap a mind into its own enigma.

Problems like If a man threw a cupcake at the speed of sound without moving but was still able to tell precisely where it would land had his 6ft friend not been in the way. Or the problems with the most obscure names you have never heard in your life, people with names you wouldn’t name your dog. These kinds of problems make you wonder what was happening in the minds of writers and math enthusiasts as they constructed each problem letter by number, with accuracy unmatched by the minds of Galileo or Archimedes. Speaking of greek gods, there is a problem with Zeus and Apollo going on a diet, surely this is informative and situations will, of course, happen in the real world.

Other real-life situations which can happen to us all is working in a number line factory. Imagine churning out numbers nonstop for arbitrary concepts, you would need all the help you could get and cpm knows that 40% of the workforce by 2030 will be in the number line industry because of the increasing demand for engineers and scientists, and accountants. People are going to be hard at work copying answers from homework help onto their papers so that they can finally get back to playing instead of watching helpful Khan Academy videos for the inevitable SBAC or SAT. CPM also importantly teaches us on a more serious note how to calculate triangles. Imagine not trying to calculate how tall the Eiffel tower is compared to where you’re standing while you and a significant other are trying to enjoy Paris. We should, in fact, be all land surveyors and physicists because I believe cpm has been preparing some of us also for this exact role in life. Forget common sense and thinking about usual wall heights and building codes, every wall should be mathematically recorded how tall or short it is so that we can have a record on hand in case we need to scale it in the event we are running for our lives. The reason why math problems often have parts that go on well into. Is to build our endurance so that in case the SAT has 200 problems we can all easily defeat them within 5 minutes and sleep for the rest of the non-important parts of the test, I mean who needs to test reading or spelling? Like the colleges say “SAT scores don’t reflect the person you are.” Come to think of it, who needs math?

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