Best places to pee

Have you ever wondered where the best place to pee on ERHS campus is? There are exactly 10 bathrooms at our school, all of which vary in quality. So, it got us thinking, where is the best place to do your business? In this article, we’ll test out all the bathrooms on campus and determine which is the best one, while also interviewing some of Eagle Rock’s finest for their opinions. 

Cafeteria Girls room 1/10

We have concluded that the cafeteria girls bathroom to be the worst bathroom in all of campus. With it being the most accessible bathroom, it also makes it the nastiest. This bathroom makes you forget why you ever needed to use it in the first place, with just its appearance.

It is overly moist, which leaves weird stains in between the cracks. In fact, it'd be difficult to even just go in to look at oneself because there is literal rust on the mirrors. Its smell is extremely unpleasant. I would definitely not potty here unless I had to. Overall this bathroom is the worst bathroom, and I would not recommend vaping or skipping class here.

“The worst place to [eat snacks] AND ditch in.” - Anonymous

Cafeteria Boys room 1/10 

This restroom has permanently scarred me multiple times over the years. Once I walked in, there was so much vape smoke that I couldn’t even see the vapers. It is also one of the most common spots for graffiti and tagging, which at least gives you something interesting to look at to take your attention away from the smell. Most of the time this restroom exudes the chemically aura of ten different flavors of vape. When the smoke dissipates it reveals the lingering musk of a hundred years of grime. To be clear, I am not trying to insult our school’s amazing custodial staff. There is nothing they, nor anyone could do to save this restroom.

North Gym Girls 4/10

Many may disagree with this, but we found that the North Gym girls bathroom is the second lowest rated. I personally have had a bad experience, and I can't say much… but let's just say, students were really feeling themselves here. This bathroom could be described in one word: stinky. It definitely had a more pee smell than a bathroom smell. 

There was trash everywhere, and once again, gunk in the tiles. Which I believe is going to be the only consistency when it comes to the restrooms. The aroma of the bathroom was a nice scent of pee. Despite the somberness of the bathroom, many would definitely ditch and vape in here. I guess you could say no one goes to this bathroom to do business, but in fact get into business.

“I don't love it but, it's a classic, it’s been with me through the hardest of times." - Maia

North gym Boys 6/10

While this bathroom used to be just as bad, if not worse, than its counterpart, it has since improved and risen to a respectable rating. The tiles are pristine, and in stark contrast to some other restrooms, all the air dryers work! It has a good location, only attracting students coming from the north-easternmost corner of campus. However, the bathroom’s biggest drawback is its strange hours. It closes at seemingly random times, resulting in frustration from any students making attempts to visit. This is sometimes accidental, so I recommend trying the door outside, and checking on the extra one inside the gym. With high cleanliness, a neutral odor, and some immaculate vibes, this bathroom is one of the best ERHS has to offer, but it is hurt by its location and random closures. If you’re in the area, don’t run to the cafeteria before checking the North Gym.

“Very spacious” - Anonymous

Track and Field Girls Room 5/10

Whether you're on the run, you're in the middle of a game, or you just so happen to have a bad batch of concession stand nachos, the Track and Field bathroom is always there for you. There's not much to say about this bathroom, but its vibes are pretty chill and if I wanted to lock in I’d go here.

This bathroom is an outlier through and through. It's got the strangest, arguably ugliest, design out of all the other ones. Not really following the nice, soothing white tiles, but rather a true blue paneling. It feels more like a hospital waiting room rather than an actual bathroom with how sanitary it is. That must explain why this has the best smell in the whole school. However there are some paper towels here and there, but that's probably from girls making sure they don't melt after the mile.

Track and field boys 7/10

I think this bathroom is overhyped. While it has an appealing design and low smoke levels, it still smells just as bad as any indoor restroom. Plus, there are no air dryers, and often no towels, so you will be stuck rubbing your hands on your clothing or any unsuspecting passerby. You’ll often hear people say that this is their favorite restroom, but they are likely in track and field and therefore biased. Don’t go out of the way to visit.

Third Floor Girls Bathroom 8/10

Behold, the least gunkiest bathroom in all of Eagle Rock! It has a fresh bathroom aroma. Their toilets may be clogged, but at least your noses aren't. In fact, I am so confident I wont get second hand smoke in here. The bathroom is so zen, I could do my homework there. In fact, I would go up there and get high… off good vibes! The wall poetry is so positive it makes my eyes red. Easily the best bathroom on this list

That’s all folks! That’s every restroom on campus, minus some that were closed while we wrote this article. We hope that the next time duty calls, you think back on our article to inform your choice.

P.S We got a tip that the most ideal bathroom to go to is the Nurse’s bathroom.