• Wyatt Zingus

The Top 10 Pets



Cats vs. Dogs: the age-old debate over which one is the better pet. It seems like all the time I hear people arguing over which pets are the superior species and comparing their stats, so I created this list so that these arguments might end once and for all.


Number 10: Chicken

Chickens, we've all seen them, and while most of us have never thought of them as being a pet, they make excellent ones. Chickens are known for their extremely high intellect and are great companions for any occasion or person. Fun Fact chickens were used as bomb defusers in WW1. You can purchase these great pets in abundance at low prices in Chinatown.


Number 9: Ducks

Have you ever wanted a pet but realized you can't afford to buy one? Well I've got good news for you. Ducks are all over at ponds and they're completely free; I personally have 12 pet ducks that I took from Echo Park. Ducks are known for being friendly family pets and very intelligent, making a great companion for any family.


Number 8: Porcupine

Porcupines are adorable creatures that we've all seen before but never thought about them as pets, but in fact, they make amazing pets. Porcupines have been known to be extremely cuddly and soft, and a great defense utilizing their spikes to shoot out at any potential attackers. Porcupines make good affordable pets and are low maintenance.


Number 7: Monkey

Monkeys are known to make excellent pets. Monkeys are great for any environment or person because of their extreme adaptability. Monkeys are known to fit anywhere you put them and will make excellent companions from surfing to assassinating the President of the Central African republic.


Number 6: Possum

Possums can do literally anything from running a marathon to faking their death 17 times a day. No other pet is quite like this... weird... giant rat thing... Possums are excellent pets for anyone living an active lifestyle. Fun Fact: world's fastest man Ethan Horn actually owns a Possum and says he always runs with him.


Number 5: Kanye West

Kanye West is one of the best possible pets that you can own. Kanye is house trained and is known to be very playful and great for anyone looking for a family pet. Kanye is a high maintenance pet but is definitely worth it in the long run.


Number 4: Crab

Crabs: they're adorable and small, these simple creatures make amazing pets. Crabs have been known to be great defenders in any situation and will attack anyone who tries to bring you harm. This pet is great for anyone looking for an attack pet.


Number 3: Giant Squid

Giant Squids are one of the best defense animals that one can have. Due to their large size, while out walking your giant squid no one will ever mess with you. Giant Squids are some of the best pets you can get and will provide you with unlimited amounts of ink, and are relatively small, only weighing 440 tons.


Number 2: Gorilla

Two words: attack gorilla. Think about it, if you had a pet gorilla no one would ever mess with you because they would know it wouldn't end well for them. Gorillas are some of the strongest animals alive and with more training could become insanely strong making the best defense pet possible.


Number 1: Racoon

I know most of you are wondering how raccoons are better than gorillas? Raccoons are some of the smartest animals alive, having an average IQ of 435 making for great pets. Not only are raccoons cute and cuddly but they will pull their weight being known to cook, clean, and even file taxes for their owners.